Hey Hey and a Big G'Day to ya, So Big Kev's in. The man who's promised sweeping changes in Australia! Sometimes I wonder if the real question is NOT if he really is the man to do it but if the Australian public will actually allow him to do it. We all know how bad the water situation is down under yet many towns have refused wind farms due to them simply being ugly! Add to that the coastal towns that have rejected test sites for 'Current Power' due to barges spoiling their million dollar views. Argh, what do I know about politics anyhow. Plus I don't have a million dollar view that's in question Politics. Not my cup of tea. I'd rather coffee with honey thanks! How am I today you ask? Thanks for asking mate, I was just about to get to that. I'm shite! Really really shite. The worst I've ever actually been. Which when you actually think about it, it can't be that bad as I never get sick enough to feel that bad....but I feel terrible! I have just been the sickest I've ever actually been....well, besides all those times in my younger years where I was found driving the porcelain bus home on many occasions after a huge night. I tell you what, some of those Porcelain Bus Journeys took hours to get through! ARGH! FLU FLU FLU! Let me tell you about the bloody Flu! I do believe it may be the first time I've actually had the REAL flu and not the 'not so real flu' that 99% of society actually catch. Simply known as the Common Cold. Turn up to work with a runny nose and hey, I've got the flu. If you've got the flu you wouldn't be at work even if you wanted to.
This I found out last night and today. Poor Canadian Rob shivered his way though most nights last week and spent every available hour in bed away from any sound and light. I woke last night soaked in sweat and shivering like a bunny. My orientation was so out of whack I couldn't have found north if someone gave me a compass. I spent the night running into walls on the way to and from any available basin. Turn the light on you idiot! I hear you say. Have you gone mad? Any form of light source set off all those landmines the 'sandman' planted as I fell asleep. Anyhow, I woke up half alive, half dead (probably more on the dead side) and called in sick. All will be well now you say. A day at home spent in warmth and peace and quiet. Huh, I'm about 200 meters away from a five storey building full of classrooms jam packed with 2000 students, loud speakers and yelling teachers. Add to that at 7:30am they begin all the yelling and screaming and throwing things around the classroom getting ready for morning exercise which begin at 8:00am. Morning exercise is one of the loudest parts of Chinas day. Not only do you have the kids yelling but you have some crazy teacher up front with his microphone yelling non-stop instructions that I'm sure the schools in Taiwan can also hear and follow each morning. Needless to say, on a normal day I'm up long before and my iPod is blasting a mix of 80's Metal, 90's Alternative and other assorted stuff for any of the kids up the font to slam dance and stage dive to if they don't like their morning exercises. After speaking to Super Shirley the Chinese English Teacher I thought about texting her a reply to her caring well wishes of 'get some sleep, relax and take care' type thing. I remember thinking this and I was just about to raise myself onto my elbow to grab my phone when I must have been abducted my Aliens. Aliens you ask? Well yeah, it's the only explanation for the most bizarre moment of my life. When I did grab the phone to text Super Shirley the Chinese English Teacher it was 3:30pm in the afternoon. Those sneaky little bastards nabbed me and returned me all within the same thought. HA HA! Just joking! But it was a bizarre feeling. I must have been so worn out that I fell asleep and totally slept though all the craziness of a Chinese Primary School. Which believe me could easily be compared to a Slayer Gig noise wise! When I woke I obviously still had the same thought on my mind and simply continued with it. How weird did I feel when eight hours had passed in a single second and also within that single second I had gone from being totally dry to being totally soaked through with sweat. Then I realised that I felt somewhat strangely refreshed and happy. I had no body aches and my head now only felt like it was in the speaker boxes at Festival Hall during a Sepultua Gig and not in the speakers at the Big Day Out. Once I swam to dry land I went about throwing away all my X-Files DVD's I spent the evening washing all my bedding and three pairs of thermals I totally soaked. How good is it to be alive and to have everything in great working order! Some could question whether my mind is in good working order! Ha ha ha, I'll leave that up to you to decide! I wake up probably more than most people thanking life for allowing me to live my dreams but when you get sick and I mean scary sick in a foreign country anyone who doesn't thank life for their health and food fortune is a fool. I thank my love for walking, bike riding and almost obsessively trying my hardest to always feel 100% for not having to put up with the above for many days and nights. It's only the Flu you say. It may be only the Flu but I live in China where all things 'Health' are questionable. The main thing that runs though ones mind during such times is .... What happens if its not 'just the Flu'? What happens if you add a little 'bird' in there...huh? I was lucky Rob had it for the week prior to me. Ha ha, that came out the wrong way didn't it? Sorry Rob! I mean that I pretty much knew what it was once I had a clear enough head to think about it. When you read about things that happen 'food wise' here in China, such a situation really does give you a good dose of FEAR! Why stay you ask? Have you read the statistics on the Melbourne Trams this year? That's the good thing about living amongst 1.3 Billion people, your odds are much better! I've got more chance of being injured riding a tram than eating the wrong thing here in China! Seriously, what the bloody hells going on with the trams this year? They just hit things for no reason. Strangely this year it is mostly other trams. Is Melbourne Transport only hiring ex-taxi drivers or is there a Tram War happing back home? Ha Ha, I'll stick to my feet and my bike! Beers N Noodles toya.....shane _________________________________ The soundtrack to this entry was Iron Maiden The album is one of the greatest live albums ever recorded during one of the greatest tours ever! Live After Death! PS: The photos were taken yesterday. Yan, YouwenJi, myself and the usual group headed to a peaceful fish farm for the day. The owners simply forgot to tell us that it was a fishless fish farm. Back in Australia you go to a fish farm for a reason, because you know there are plenty of fish in there and that you WILL catch one. You only hope that it's not a HUGE bugger as you have to pay by the weight. Here you go to a fish farm to simply sit in wonder at the fact that no-one around you is catching a damn thing. Except for me who caught the damn Flu! Seriously, we had a wonderful time. Those who wanted to sit and stare at the motionless bobbles (or whatever those plastic things are that ate attached to your line) stayed and stared. The rest of us ventured into the hills full of Tea Trees and around lunch time we all headed indoors for a huge feast of fresh fish, vegetables and other assorted inners and outers. PSS: They got the fish out of the tank for us! BUGGER!